Trials

Our family has been going through trials with our youngest son Nolan.
My husband was wreslting around with him like any dad does with their son and pressed his head to his chest and he screamed.. Not a fun playful scream.
So he looked and saw a bump on his chest and pressed on it and he cried out again... Concerned he showed me and I obviously became alarmed. I called the doctor
the next day and they wanted to see him, they ended up doing an x ray that day and said it probably is nothing and wanted to just check bone formation. They called back that day and said they wanted to do an ultrasound to look at the soft tissue they saw.
So axiously I awaited the phone call after the ultrasound assuming it still wouldnt be the worst news but wondered what it was. 
The doctor said they were stumped and wanted to do an MRI to make sure it wasnt a tumor but assuming it wasnt and probably was a cyst or lymphnode that was possibly infected.
So Nolan was put under for his MRI in twlight mode I saw his eyes slit open and his body go lymp and they laid him on the imaging table... With tears in my eyes
I walked back to his room with my husband. How could this be happening? My perfect son? My precious little baby boy had something wrong with him?
Afterwards they brought him back to us and he drunkenly woke up and was back to his old self. We got a phone call the next day a Saturday morning.
They told us we were going to have to meet with a pediatric oncologist because they cannot rule out this isnt cancer.  What?
My world stopped.
So we listened over the phone and as I knew the verse in Philippians 4:7 but my heart wanted to overflow with human emotions.
We ended up seeing her this morning and they showed us what it looks like and where it is. The pediatric Radiologist read the film this time and wanted a bone scan done.
Well the mass is actually inside the bone his chest bone and he is swelling on the outside of his bone and they do not know why.
So now We meet with a pediatric surgeon in the morning and he is going to set up to do a biopsy on it ( collecting a piece of it surgically and sending it to pathology to see if its malignant) so that could take place within a week or two. And thursday the little man will have to go under again for a bone scan to check and see if there are any more like it in
his bones ( this could be very serious)
So with all of this being said I have already learned a few things..."Do not be afraid stand firm and you will see the deliverance of the Lord will bring you today. The Lord will fight for You , You need only be still"
Exodus 14:13,14
"Be still and know that I am God" Psalm 46:10
So many promises my God gives me over and over I need to start believing and start living. "Consider it pure joy when you face trials of many kinds" James 1:2
So I trust in my God. I trust in his Sovereignty. Giving Nolan over to Him has been the hardest part in this saying Lord, whether this is something that they eventually figure out and we never have to deal with it again or God this is the worst case senario and I give Nolan to you... With tear filled eyes. my God will receive the glory no matter what.
Thank you for allowing us a glimpse into the bigger picture.
When we are weak you truly are strong. We love you precious Jesus.

-ashley




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